Lessons from a next-level ‘Ladies Man’
To be a ‘Ladies man’ does not have to be a bad thing, in fact it can be a damn GOOD thing.
If you can do it ‘right’
(as in , with respect, skill and integrity.)
I know an amazing man
who is super skilled at attracting women and lighting them up
he is 75
and one of my best friends
and one of the most inspiring guides on the subject of intimacy
and he lives it, and looks GREAT for it!
Here is a little about his story and his tips on how to be a ‘next level lover’.
Pay good attention guys..
I have known Jaimini for a few years now. I met him at a meditation night and at first I just thought of him as the wacky latino man in the corner but when he asked me out for lunch I thought perhaps it would be nice to get to know this unique character. When we were out together I noticed that every single woman that we encountered knew him and that he engaged in non stop witty banter with them all, witnessing this, at first I thought… ‘hmmm maybe he is a sleaze ball…’. But our friendship has grown and grown since that time and I have found him not to be a sleaze ball at all but rather a man of incredible integrity. A true yogi who is dedicated to his spiritual practice, to selfless service to the community, to his love for dance and having fun and, most of all, to the Divine Mother in all her forms. Looking so vibrant and amazing at 75, i conclude that this is an example of man who has very efficiently channelled his sexual energy ( and he chuckles in agreement when i share this view with him..) I love to interview Jaimini on the subject of loving women as he has some very tasty morsels of advice for men who would like to bring out the best in women… What i have to share in this article applies to how a man can approach and BE with a woman. But its also applies to how anyone can be alive and present to another human being. I witness people of all descriptions lighting up in Jaimini’s playful presence. One of his many sayings is ‘there is nothing as good as being yourself’, and truly this man goes to town with being himself…do you perhaps know any elderly men who drive around on a motorbike, meditate every morning in a beach shack made with his own hands (miraculously, on a Byron Bay beach without any ‘legal’ permission!), laughs and flirts constantly with both respect and abandon and deep joy, and kicks every ones arse on the dance floor? No I didn’t think so. But most of all what I find incredible about Jaimini is his seemingly inexhaustible capacity to love women and to be loved back by them! Upon getting to know him and hearing more and more about his life the more impressed I am, this man has been romancing women since he was 8 years old…that’s right! That is a good 67 years of loving and celebrating women-woah! A brief account of his life as a ladies man… He was a pint sized romeo in Argentina then a devoted husband to his yogini wife for 30 years. He then embarked on a bit of a wild sex crazed period of his life (in which time he admits that he did not always behave with impeccable integrity but apparently learnt some valuable lessons). These days he has refined his appetite for lovemaking and he lives his simple humble little life in the Byron Shire dancing and flirting with every woman in town at the ripe old age of 75. When Jaimini flirts, it is an act of devotion When Jaimini is playfully flirting with you, you do not feel like he is trying to GET something from you, you feel like he is truly seeing and celebrating the goddess in you. When you are with him you feel like you are the only woman in the world. (And in that moment- YOU ARE the only woman in the world to him, you are the goddess, right there, and he is delighting in you- and he really is, he sees you as a beautiful sacred being, he really does, and he isn’t looking for something back, for him, it is enough to honour you. You sense that he looks right inside of you at you core essence and beauty. You feel cherished, appreciated, seen, acknowledged, elevated, respected and LOVED- in the highest sense of the word This is intimacy in action….and this man is damn good at it. Teach the men please! So I am constantly telling him ‘Teach the men, teach the men!”. But of course the women need to learn too. For all of us our capacity for intimacy rests in our ability to open ourselves fully and share our deep hearts with another, for this we could all use some guidance at times… Here is my humble attempt to present the core ingredients of Jaimini’s recipe for love.
Vital Ingredients in Jaimini’s recipe for good loving
Presence– This is the basic all-important ingredient…. There is nothing like having every ounce of someone’s genuinely appreciative attention to make you feel special….Presence is sex-y!!!!! When you are fully centred in yourself, then you are connected to your power- this is presence. The best gift you can give to yourself, or anyone else, is that of your loving presence and undivided attention. Self knowledge –Presence comes when we are comfortable with ourselves and when we have taken the time to explore and accept who we are. Meditation really is the ticket to this. It is the way to what Jaimani calls ‘ the bliss from within’, the bliss that comes from regularly looking inside of oneself and finding the ‘light of a hundred suns’ that burns within us. Take the time to get to know yourself through a daily practice of meditation, begin your path to greater intimacy by becoming more intimate with yourself! Spiritual practice and awakened sexual energy Every single morning at sunrise Jaimini can be found down at the beach doing his meditation and yoga. It is this kind of dedicated practice that elevates him to ‘next level’ ladies man in my opinion. Up level your capacity for loving through getting into your body. A daily practice of yoga or chi gung can help you to become more sensitive and sexually vibrant. Integrity-The more sexually activated we become the more integrity we need, Jaimini emphasises the need for truthfulness at all times and the importance of being sure and clear about what you feel.
Integrity and awareness combined with sexual energy is a powerful aphrodisiac….
Responsiveness–Here comes the juicy bit; intimacy is about giving and receiving, about responding to and enjoying the flow of life force between one person and another and quenching each others thirst for recognition, love and touch. Go on a journey of discovery! On the way stay curious and responsive to the flow of energy and touch and sensation. The other all important ingredient-FUN!–Make it as fun as possible and laugh a lot (this is one of Jaimini’s best love secrets). When you are laughing you are undefended and fully open to be love and be loved… Stay with a sense of curiosity and wonder and play-full innocence! And i asked Jamini for some practical pointers for lovers (particularly men) and this is what he said-
Jaimani’s words of advice for lovers
Be sincere-Look deep into their eyes.
Make a verbal invitation….ask them if they would like to go on a journey without knowing where it will lead.
Feel the presence of each other, communicate through feeling rather than words. Go beyond the mind to pure alive presence and state of innocence
See what is deeply inside of your partner,
Immerse yourself in the pristine moment of that looking and celebrate that, feel into your self, what are you attracted to?
Speak about what you admire without expectation of outcome.
Woman is not a conquest, it is a progressive journey.
Give gentle loving touch whilst being fully present.
If you are in touch with the level of internal communication within then the rest will follow naturally
Hmmm sounds good huh? ( women everywhere are sighing ‘yes’…:)
I hope this was helpful and inspiring , contact me if you have any questions.