Breaking down or cracking open?…How to find the gifts in personal crisis
There comes a point when you have to choose to let that which does not work in your life break down, so that you may be cracked open to something bigger, wider, and truer…
Many of us have been at that point, or are arriving at that point.
We are getting that inner feeling that things gotta change, we have to slow down, let go, take stock.
Maybe we need to start saying yes
maybe we need to start saying a lot of NO, before we get to our yes
It looks different for each of us, but one thing is almost certain , and that is that before we get to the juicy bit we probably have to travel for a while though very choppy waters indeed. There might be an earth quake or 2, or perhaps a desert to pass through.
This might look like a ‘break down’ to those around you,
Breaking down and cracking open, transformation and crisis….there certainly is a fine line between the two, and often they are misunderstood..
My message to any of you who are ‘going thought it’ this is a reminder that YOU ARE NORMAL AND IN FACT YOU ARE DOING GREAT.
And i would also like to share with you some important tips to help you along your path as you traverse the rugged terrain of inner transformation.
First of all i want to say
THANK YOU FOR FEELING IT
When we sign up to feel what we had been suppressing, to explore what triggers us, and embody the full whammy of what we are…we are not only serving our own deepening into truth and creating a more authentic life, we are also serving the collective.
I am no stranger to this radical reforming, and there have been many moments where I have wondered what the hell I was doing???why couldn’t i have signed up for a ‘normal life’ and not have to feel ALL THIS!!!….but from the other side of the waves of intensity I can consistently report that the process of breaking down has been an extraordinary process leading to a re birth that i could never imagine.
If we are going though this intensive re shaping whilst in the west it is SO easy to feel like a mess, a failure, like something is wrong, if we went to a doctor at that time for sure we would be prescribed anti depressants…
Yet for most people this would just lead to a further deadening of our being, not a healing.
Healing is a process of coming back to wholeness, and within wholeness there is a whole lot of grit and grief that we have been suppressing under the guise of ‘ having it all together’.
Letting go of control and the habit of ‘holding it all together’ does not always look or feel pretty…., it is definitely not always easy, and mainstream education will probably not provide you with the skills to deal with this shift effectively…
But if you are at crisis point, indeed you are at a place of opportunity, a place where great leaps happen, a place of radical transformation.
With understanding, the process of breaking down can become a deeply meaning-full and transformative process, a ‘cracking open’ to more of who we are… as long as we know how to use it, know how to meet it, and know how to nurture ourselves all along the way.
The question is….
How can we make friends with the unknown and face the wildness and the intensity of our unraveling, ever revealing, deeply wounded, beings?
How can we embrace crisis and allow the process to birth us into a more empowered and connected version of ourselves?
It is so easy to think that because we are feeling intense feelings like grief, sadness, terror etc with no ‘good reason’ for them, then something must be wrong.
And yet sometimes in order to break through our old patterns, there is some deep purging unprocessed emotional material from the past that needs to happen.
It could be that the ‘stuff’ that we held, way down deep inside, needs to come to the surface to be felt, to be cleared,
To make more space for fresh life to move in and flow through!!
I will share you an important secret…. those deep, sometimes messy, feelings that make no sense…
They Just wants to be felt!
That’s all! They just want you gentle loving attention so they can come out of hiding and transform into fresh raw energy.
(And it might take time for it all to work its way through..)
You may need to be seen as a little crazy for a while..
A word of advice;
Be discerning who you share your process with because many people will not understand.
(Sad but true..)
If you are going through this kind of clearing out process, most of the people who are not familiar with the path of transformation are going to think you are an emotional freak.
At this time, try and surround yourself with other people who are dedicated to exploring themselves, people who will hold a loving and non judgmental space for you, people who will let you cry and wail without asking you ‘what is wrong’ and trying to fix it.
You do not need to be fixed; you are being ‘worked on’ beautifully and efficiently by the intelligence of life,
Your job is to stay present and aware, that’s all!
So the first point of care;
Hang out with people who ‘get it’ and minimise time with people who don’t (even just until the storm has passed)
It really helps if we can create the opportunity to take time out and really ‘go there’ for a period of time, to really devote yourself to the process. Usually you just need some good old time and space to break through to a deeper understanding of what is really going on.
Whether we have the opportunity for that, in the form of a retreat from the world, one thing is certain and that is we need supportive environments, friends and influences to help hold the space for us.
Support is the key word
If we have support and love from the outside, and compassion and tenderness from the inside…..
If we allow ourselves time to just lye down on the earth, cry tears that make no sense, and keep on breathing deeply into it, respecting it and expressing it.
Then sooner or later….
(seems you can’t rush it…)
Sooner or later something of incredible worth emerges.
A deep ground within makes itself known in the spaces which had previously been all tied up, holding and carrying deep wounding, keeping old programs alive and well, sucking on our life force.
What consistently helps me is my relationship to everything as MA; the Divine Mother. I say thank you constantly, for this opportunity she gives me to learn more about who i am, for the precious chance to get more intimate with the truth beyond the bullshit.
My message to anyone out there who wonders if they are going bonkers when they are just feeling a hell of a lot.
KEEP ON GOING!!!
You are doing it for all of us, you are courageous enough to face your inner reality head on and i applaud you for your willingness to go there and unearth your deepest truth!
Keep on walking your courageous path but diligently NURTURE yourself as you go!
Let the earth hold you, lye down with your hands on your womb space and breathe and feel! let loving people hug you and tell you how much they love you. Hold yourself, speak kind words, do what feels good and right and nourishing…
Notice that everything is always changing, that YOU are changing!
Allow yourself to be crafted into a ever more naked, surrendered and magnificent version of yourself.
(And who gives a fuck if that looks a little messy along the way)
It is an amazing journey and you are in safe hands!
Trust the process, Trust yourself. Trust that you are held by the Great Mother… even as you are put you through your paces!
And you are going to find so much more power and energy and intimacy will open up to you.
And if you are in that place of needing some more external support, there is nothing like having a loving guide to hold space for you and provide practices and guidance to help you find your way through..this is what i provide in my Earth and Fire Coaching programs. I would love to support you! contact me if you are interested and want to know more!
Also these meditation recordings give you the chance to nourish and support yourself in the comfort of your own home click here for more details..